A Blur

The last few days have been a blur. They really have. I left home. Not really knowing what I was going to do. Facing all my fears. Coming to terms with the last few years of my life. Being honest with the world around me.

And now here I am. In a home of my own. My kiddos each have their own bed/crib to sleep in. We have a cute little house, with everything we could ever need. And plenty of food. It's the first time in forever, that I've even felt 2% safe. That's saying a lot. But it's the truth.

And we're doing better. My boys seem relaxed a little. My girls are calm. Although, we've had to sleep together for the last few nights. My girls just seem more fragile than my boys. But I"m here to shower all of them with as much love as they need.

I'm also working for J. At the Ranch. I'm going to be in charge of all the laundry. For some reason, it feels like it's not enough. Like I need to do more for J. More for Lola. My 2 friends really stepped up for me and my kids. I'm so grateful to them. They'll never know just how much this means to me and my kids! :)