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I jumped on the bandwagon and joined twitter. You can find me here. I don't exactly know why I joined. Or what I might tweet about. But I thought you might like to know. If you're on twitter too, you can follow me. And I'll follow you! :)

Exhausted

I'm feeling exhausted. And overwhelmed. I guess, I should expect it to come with the territory. I'm a single mom of 4 kiddos. Trying to balance the entire world on my shoulders. And it's starting to catch up with me. So I'm trying to take time out of my day for me. Like putting on makeup, doing my hair, painting my nails.

I know it sounds shallow. But I think I need to take care of me, in order to better care for my kiddos. Does that make any sense at all? I hope it does. I don't expect to go all out again. To be like that same girl I was 5 or 6 years ago. But I want to be a woman who cares again.

And I think that starts with better sleeping and eating. Eventually, I want to try and exercise. You know, just be a healthy person. I hope that helps. I'm so tired. And it's tough. I suppose, I just need to pray more. :)

Sinful Colors

I recently went to Walgreen's. I had to pick up a prescription. And while we waited, I went to visit the beauty area. And I found these beauties. Sinful Colors nail polish. And they're only $2 a bottle. I couldn't help myself. I bought 3. And last night, after the kids went to sleep, I painted my nails. A fun bright pink. It feels good to take care of myself again. :)

Ally Pie's Birthday

It's almost been a week since Ally Pie's birthday. Oh, my little princess. She is just a doll! Her birthday is on Valentine's Day. And this year, it fell on the weekend.

Not only was it a big deal because it was Ally's birthday. But it was Ally's 1st birthday. And I was trying to come up with something to do for her birthday. I decided to make 2 cakes. 1 for us to eat, and 1 just for Ally. I always wanted to do that for my kids. Get them their own mini cake. So they could make a big mess!

Ally is every part a little girl. She didn't want to make a mess. Until she tasted the yummy chocolate. And we had presents. On the Friday beforehand, my neighbor watched Ally for me. And I took the rest of the kids shopping with me. We got Ally Pie a new dress, a pair of shoes, some hair bows, a baby doll, and a cute little duck. My sons picked out the toys. And we wrapped everything up.

Ally Pie wasn't so sure about ripping open the paper. But once she got the hang of it, she really enjoyed it. So we celebrated Ally's birthday in the morning. With yummy blueberry muffins, scrambled eggs, and juice. She opened her gifts. And got so excited when her big brothers kept singing Happy Birthday to her.

After nap time, we had cake. And we played for a few hours together. Right as I was going to get dinner started, my neighbor came over. She invited us over to their house. Literally, we live steps away from each other. And they had made dinner for Ally Pie's birthday! We enjoyed dinner, cake, and ice cream. Very fun evening. And then Ally Pie got some more presents.

We're so grateful for the love. I kept telling my neighbor's "Thank you." But I'm pretty sure they thought I was nuts! They're just amazing people. And so kind hearted. I'm so grateful for everything. :)

Taking Some Time

For some reason, this video caught my eye tonight. I was just looking for some easy hair ideas on YouTube. And I came across Sara's video. She just seems so happy and bubbly. Something I really need right now.

But I remember the days, when I took the time. to get ready in the morning. I'd put on makeup. I'd do my hair. Very similar to this. I really enjoyed getting ready in the morning. Then life happened. I stopped wearing makeup. And my hair is permanently in this messy bun thing.

But this video has motivated me. I'm definitely going to start taking some time to get ready in the morning. It's important. It makes a person feel better. I realized that lately. I'm probably not going to spend this much time on my hair, but I'm going to try and make some sort of effort. :)

We Heart You!!!

It's LOVE Day! For me, I've never really had a "romantic Valentine." But when I had my first baby, I just knew I was going to celebrate every single holiday. Especially a day that celebrates LOVE! Now, I have 4 little Valentine's to love, cuddle, and kiss all day!

There's nothing more that I could ask for. I've got all the LOVE in the world from them! Today, I want to make their day special. Because they are my special 4 hearts. We don't have a lot. But you would be surprised at how far a heart shaped cookie cutter, felt, construction paper, scissors, glue, glitter, and some love can go. I spent my night making each one of my kiddos a special Valentine. And I plan on using my cookie cutter to make heart shaped food all day long. Hope you have a day filled with lots of LOVE!!! :)

Happy Birthday Princess Ally Pie!

Dear Ally Pie,

I love you with all my heart. I really do! You're 1 today. I just can't believe how big you're getting! I knew you were a very special little girl. From the very first time I found about you. You're filled with love and kisses. And all those sweet things little girls are all about! But I think you're extra special...because you're a "love baby." Yuppers, born on Valentine's Day!

The day you were born, it was a very exciting day! And all I could think about, was holding you in my arms. I wanted a little girl so badly. And I knew that 1 day, we'd get to sit and play dress up and dollies. And you're perfect. You were born perfect! And you're perfect now!

Over the last year, I've watched you grow big and strong. From rolling over to crawling. It's been so special. I really do love being your mommy. I hope you love being my little princess! It makes me smile every time I see you toddling around. Still unsure of your next step. But so happy to be on 2 legs!

And waking up to your smiling face every day, oh it makes me so very happy! I love how you sit and wait for me to pick you up from your crib. And how you hold so tight to your baby doll. My heart really does pour over with love for you! Happy Birthday Princess Ally Pie! :)

Love,
Mommy

Lash Blast

It's the simple things in life that make me smile. It feels like lifetimes ago when I was going to cosmetology school. Lifetimes. Since having my 1st son, I honestly have worn makeup maybe 4 times. I don't even think that many!

I've missed it. I've missed buying and trying new items. And I've missed the way you feel when you take the time to get ready. I splurged a little yesterday. And I bought myself a mascara and a lipgloss. Nothing fancy. Just Covergirl.

But it has done wonders for my self esteem! I feel so amazing. And beautiful. Like the makeup can help me to conquer the world. I know it sounds silly. But it's the truth.

And in case you're like me, and have been hiding under a rock, this mascara is amazing! It's so black. And makes your eyelashes look gorgeous. No clumping. But very buildable. Definitely something that I'd use over and over again. Who knew $10 worth of makeup would make such a HUGE difference for me? :)

Mac-N-Cheese

Something as simple as Mac-N-Cheese makes my boys so happy! We have a large supply of food at our fingertips now. We've never really had this much. Never close to this much. And it feels a little, dare I say it, shocking. I'm used to having a few things in the pantry. My hubby bringing home whatever, for the next day. But not a lot.

This afternoon, I asked my boys what they wanted to eat for dinner. Very excitedly, they jumped up and down when I opened the pantry. And they right away pointed to the Mac-N-Cheese. Yes, that's what we had for dinner. With a little salad and some ham. It was simple, but good. And exactly what we all needed! Oh, and I think it's the first time they've ever had Kraft's. It really is different from the no name brand. :)

A Blur

The last few days have been a blur. They really have. I left home. Not really knowing what I was going to do. Facing all my fears. Coming to terms with the last few years of my life. Being honest with the world around me.

And now here I am. In a home of my own. My kiddos each have their own bed/crib to sleep in. We have a cute little house, with everything we could ever need. And plenty of food. It's the first time in forever, that I've even felt 2% safe. That's saying a lot. But it's the truth.

And we're doing better. My boys seem relaxed a little. My girls are calm. Although, we've had to sleep together for the last few nights. My girls just seem more fragile than my boys. But I"m here to shower all of them with as much love as they need.

I'm also working for J. At the Ranch. I'm going to be in charge of all the laundry. For some reason, it feels like it's not enough. Like I need to do more for J. More for Lola. My 2 friends really stepped up for me and my kids. I'm so grateful to them. They'll never know just how much this means to me and my kids! :)

New Chapter in My Book

Today, well I'm starting over. Over in life. I finally got the courage to move on. I realized that my kids and I deserve better. A lot better. And I finally got enough courage to leave.

I'm now a single mommy of 4. I have some minor work things lined up. But no real job. I haven't had the opportunity to work outside of home in years. But I need to support my family. My kids are the world to me. And whatever I have to do, I'm going to do it for them.

In all actuality, I got most of my courage from Kandee. She has a wonderfully inspirational blog, half about makeup...and half about her tough life. I also enjoy her family blog. You can see what an amazing mom she is. The strength and will she has to provide for her family.

One bad night, after some horrible things, I sat at my computer reading both of Kandee's blogs. From the very beginning. It's funny. Because my friend sent me the link to the blog. Because it was about makeup. But soon I was balling my eyes out. Holding my baby girl. And realizing, I needed to do this for all of us.

So here we are. Starting over. I don't have much. But I can provide my kids with love, safety, and security. I'm working on a job. And I have a strong faith. I know God will provide for us. He will help give us the strength to make it through the tough times. Because he believes in the good in people.

I know that my kiddos have suffered enough. And I know that I have to be stronger for all of us. It's going to be tough. But I'm ready for it. Because in the end, life will be better for all of us. As long as we have each other. :)